In summary of the last week or so post marathon, I have been dashing about trying to catch up on the things I've missed, neglected, and forgotten during training and my trip. All the while, it all seems so insignificant. This comes not from having run a marathon but from having run a marathon for such a great purpose. Everything else seems trivial and a bit trite. I'm struggling to hold onto that while simultaneously shifting my perspective just enough so that I can move forward with all the mundane.
Now, as I face down my art deadlines, I'm battling a train of thought that I never thought would cross my mind... Do I want to leave my legacy through time spent with friends, family, and amazing people? or do I want to leave it through a strong body of artwork? In reality, I want both. This week, though, I've had to choose. It's been hard. It's done a number on my head and my heart. Maybe I've never really considered the question until now. I know I want to use this life, every second of it, for a purpose greater than me. The Lord has graced me with a passion for creating art. He has also graced me with amazing people both who love me but also who I can reach out to. I live such a blessed life it seems surreal to have any real struggles. In truth, I really don't have any. How do I move on from here? I'm really not sure.... but I know it won't ever be the same.
ps. I went for a run Wednesday. I walked the bulk of it. My knees just weren't having it. I've been cleared by my PT people. It's just going to take time for my body to fully recover. I want to make time for a few "runs" this week. With the deadlines, we'll see.
Showing posts with label marathon. Show all posts
Showing posts with label marathon. Show all posts
Monday, November 2, 2009
Tuesday, October 27, 2009
the BIG one
If you haven't already noticed my facebook updates or seen me and my beaming face, I'm back! I've been meaning to get an update out to everyone all week and haven't had the time to think straight much less make sense of the trip! Aside from being amazing, I'm having a hard time getting the experience into words. Here goes, all the gory details! (it's lengthy, be warned) Oh, and if you didn't hear, I met my fundraising goal 2 days before I left!
We left on Friday (the 16th) out of Charlotte. I met up with some other teammates to drive up to Charlotte (at 5:30! am!). The drive up 85, the airport,
and most of the flight were uneventful. We had a football team on our flight which made things interesting. Not only are they big boys crammed into a tiny little space, but some had never flown before. We experienced a few choice words from one or two of them upon takeoff while the rest were more the "PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR" variety. (I'm told the flight attendant stayed with one of them during the entire takeoff and supposedly gave him a pair of wings when we landed.) This was the part of the trip we call "giddy." I tried to sleep but after a point gave up and shared the window with Rosalyn and goofed off. Everything is more fun when you are that excited. I think we exclaimed over every mountain range between the east and west coast. I had a stupid girl moment on the plane as I had never had to use the facilities in mid-flight before. The flight attendant looked at me like I was below stupid and pointed to the giant yellow letters on the door "PUSH" while proceeding to demonstrate. I'm sure my sister can relate. What can I say? I'm special in a multitude of ways.
From landing, there was the shuttle to the hotel, check in, and general overwhelming excitement to finally be there. We all dispersed excitedly-- off to our rooms, some off to tours right off the bat, others just to find food. After checking in, most of us met up to find some grub together and grab our race packets.
The weather was beyond perfect! Sunny, blue, cloudless sky with temperatures in the low 70's. It was beautiful! The expotique was a little underwhelming. Exciting to be there and all that but not much else in the way of an expo. Niketown was interesting.
We found our names on the wall of 20,000 women who together raised over $14 million for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society! We perused Niketown where some shopped, some danced, and all scoffed at the prices. Saturday evening we all headed into Chinatown for Chinese! I've never had such good Chinese in my life (ok, the food at the Chance household comes close- rightly so)! Some were tired and headed back to the hotel after dinner. Penny and I traipsed off to do some shopping and take in Chinatown. It might just be my favorite part of San Francisco! It's cheesy, tacky, and beautiful all at the same time.
Saturday we were on our own to explore! I chose to hit the highlights by being the ultimate tourist. I got a $25 day pass for a bus tour. I managed to see a good chunk of the city, hop on and off as I pleased, and limit the amount of ground I had to cover. I made the mistake of starting in Chinatown, but nothing was open yet. Back on the bus, next stop.
I got to see St. Peter and Paul's Cathedral which was stunning. I really wanted to take pictures of the inside but didn't want to be disruptive either. However, I simply don't have words for the experience of standing on that street and hearing the bells chime the hour. There was an ethereal feeling to that moment that few others can touch. I walked over to where I could see Coit Tower, but opted not to go all the way up (big hill the day before the race? bad idea). From there I walked over a few blocks to where I could see Lombard street (from afar-- again, big hill the day before the race...). 
Back on the tour bus, we headed towards the coast to Fisherman's Wharf. I didn't get off but took a few pictures from the bus. It was over the Golden Gate, a quick photo shoot, and back over on the bus! From there, I got off at Golden Gate Park to check out the Japanese Tea Gardens. Absolutely beautiful! I didn't stay for tea, but wish I had! From there, the bus took us through the city to see a lot of amazing architecture and landmarks. If you're ever in the city and want to see a lot in a short amount of time, I highly recommend these bus tours. They're great!
After the bus tour, I was starving but didn't want to waste time at a sit down restaurant by myself. I stopped in to a local pizza shop, bought a slice and a water for $4.25! The pizza was great and the water was much needed. I wandered on over to SFMOMA from there and soaked up some really stunning work! I could have spent so much more of my day in there and been happy as a lark. I ran into a dear friend who was in the city visiting for kicks. The Richard Avedon exhibit was absolutely unbelievable. Those images move you in ways you would never expect. It took me completely by surprise and in true Susan at MOMA fashion I walked through the exhibit with my mouth agape. I about lost my composure when I rounded a corner to be greeted with Ernesto Neto!
I had to contain myself from openly doing a happy dance right there on the spot. Other highlights of pure joy were Judy Chicago, Kiki Smith, Andrea Zittel, Jean Arp just to name a few. After SFMOMA, I was running out of time so I hotfooted it back to the hotel, threw on a clean shirt, and ran out the door to meet up with my team for our Inspiration Dinner/ Pasta Party. As an unrelated side note, there are super interesting street people in San Francisco... I saw the same guy at two different spots along the race course on Sunday!
I had no idea what to expect. I was blown away. This is the part of the trip we call "speechless." Every Team In Training coach was lined up on both sides of the entrance to this convention center, decked out in every nutty bit of purple and green they could find armed with every noisemaker and cow bell they could get their hands on. Every single one of them were going nuts for every single one of us. It was beyond overwhelming. While we were all giddy with amazement, we were all brought to tears. (I'm tearing up just thinking about it.) For the 6 months we trained, these coaches were there for us through the pain, sweat, tears, chafing, crankiness, and every other emotion you can imagine. You'd think they'd be sick of us by now. Nope, they're so proud they're about to bust.... and to boot, they're cheering their butts off for you. Not only did they line up the lobby, they went down the stairs, and around the corner into the ballroom filled to the brink with tables for Team In Training chapters from all over the country. The inspiration was there all right! We then ate like we'd never seen food before (despite the mediocrity), and enjoyed some wonderful speakers including an amazing survivor (who ran the race with us!), Joan Benoit, and John Bingham. All were wonderful!
Rosalyn and I went back to Chinatown afterwards to pick up our last "oh, crap, I DO want to buy that" purchases before we hit the hay. Then, it was race day!
Race day.... it's here and you can't believe it. The gun finally goes off. 20 minutes later, you cross the start line. I will give the DJ props for immediately playing "...all the single ladies..." immediately after the gun. Kudos, good choice. The course was beautiful! Absolutely stunning! The hills were primarily in the first half and were not as awful as I expected. You train for hills so you're prepared. They were longer than anything we have in Greenville, but thankfully there were no cable car hills involved! The weather was pretty perfect for race day! It was overcast, a little foggy (but not so much you couldn't see the sights!), and cool (but not cold). The sun came out sporadically but never made it too warm. I felt great the entire first half and ran most of it, walking through the aid stations. Between mile 13 and 14, I started to hurt. Nothing specific, just pain. I kept going. I didn't stop to stretch even once. I knew if I stopped moving, I wouldn't start again. I kept going. I knew I needed to get to mile 19 by 1 pm or they'd reroute me. Somewhere around mile 16, I saw the 5:30 finish pace group on the other side of our out and back loop. I hadn't seen the 6:00 finish pace group pass me, which meant I was right where I needed to be. Shortly after, we saw the lake. That lake seemingly took forever to run around. This is the part of the trip I call "the valley." I reached mile 19 and relaxed a little. Shortly thereafter, I hit the wall... a big dark mental valley. From mile 21 or so until mile 24, it was bleak for me. I kept going through the pain but walked a lot. I crested that last hill onto the Great Highway and knew I'd finish. Finally, a very nice coach got our attention and said "just two stoplights ladies"... you want to talk about tears of joy? That started it. I couldn't see the finish line yet, but that meant it was there, just two stoplights ahead of me. Then I hit the really enthusiastic TNT cheer teams. They set my tears flowing. Thankfully, I pulled it together enough to cross the finish beaming instead of sobbing. Sadly, I didn't have anything left to enjoy the firemen at the finish. This is the part of the trip I call "brain dead." The volunteers graciously ushered me where I needed to go and I managed to find the giant TNT tent, and fall weeping into Rosalyn's arms. While she fetched a PB&J sandwich for me, our coaches found me and the tears continued. I shoved the sandwich in my face, despite the fact I didn't want it. We sat and chatted a bit, despite my minimal brain function. From there, it was a 1/2 mile walk to the shuttle and back to the hotel. Ice bath, hot shower, a little rest, and off to the Victory Party. We ate in the Relaxation Room of the Victory Party (pretty good food) and wandered over to the 80's room afterward. Penny got us (most of us) out on the dance floor and moving (ok, kinda-- in my case it was mostly upper body dancing). After a good time on the dance floor, we started fading pretty fast. And the daunting task of repacking faced us.... back to our rooms we went!
(This is for mom. She wanted me to wear a cape. I didn't but someone did!) 
(Tiffany's finisher's necklace!)
From there, it was back on the plane (uneventful flight) and back down 85 to Greenville. The trip of a lifetime.
I want to thank all of you for all of your support (emotional and financial), love, encouragement, and prayers. I would never have gotten this experience any other way! Thank you to Coach Cathy and Coach Penny for everything! While I trained primarily by myself and had the support of Coach John all along the way, you two really pulled through for me in so many ways! Thanks to Rosalyn for being an awesome weekend roomie!
Now what?!
I'm currently cramming in preparation for Greenville's Open Studio Tour, then it's LLS's Turkey Trot on November 14th. The next big adventure? I'm not sure yet.... but I'll keep you posted.
We left on Friday (the 16th) out of Charlotte. I met up with some other teammates to drive up to Charlotte (at 5:30! am!). The drive up 85, the airport,
and most of the flight were uneventful. We had a football team on our flight which made things interesting. Not only are they big boys crammed into a tiny little space, but some had never flown before. We experienced a few choice words from one or two of them upon takeoff while the rest were more the "PUT YOUR HANDS IN THE AIR" variety. (I'm told the flight attendant stayed with one of them during the entire takeoff and supposedly gave him a pair of wings when we landed.) This was the part of the trip we call "giddy." I tried to sleep but after a point gave up and shared the window with Rosalyn and goofed off. Everything is more fun when you are that excited. I think we exclaimed over every mountain range between the east and west coast. I had a stupid girl moment on the plane as I had never had to use the facilities in mid-flight before. The flight attendant looked at me like I was below stupid and pointed to the giant yellow letters on the door "PUSH" while proceeding to demonstrate. I'm sure my sister can relate. What can I say? I'm special in a multitude of ways.From landing, there was the shuttle to the hotel, check in, and general overwhelming excitement to finally be there. We all dispersed excitedly-- off to our rooms, some off to tours right off the bat, others just to find food. After checking in, most of us met up to find some grub together and grab our race packets.
The weather was beyond perfect! Sunny, blue, cloudless sky with temperatures in the low 70's. It was beautiful! The expotique was a little underwhelming. Exciting to be there and all that but not much else in the way of an expo. Niketown was interesting.
We found our names on the wall of 20,000 women who together raised over $14 million for the Leukemia and Lymphoma Society! We perused Niketown where some shopped, some danced, and all scoffed at the prices. Saturday evening we all headed into Chinatown for Chinese! I've never had such good Chinese in my life (ok, the food at the Chance household comes close- rightly so)! Some were tired and headed back to the hotel after dinner. Penny and I traipsed off to do some shopping and take in Chinatown. It might just be my favorite part of San Francisco! It's cheesy, tacky, and beautiful all at the same time.Saturday we were on our own to explore! I chose to hit the highlights by being the ultimate tourist. I got a $25 day pass for a bus tour. I managed to see a good chunk of the city, hop on and off as I pleased, and limit the amount of ground I had to cover. I made the mistake of starting in Chinatown, but nothing was open yet. Back on the bus, next stop.
I got to see St. Peter and Paul's Cathedral which was stunning. I really wanted to take pictures of the inside but didn't want to be disruptive either. However, I simply don't have words for the experience of standing on that street and hearing the bells chime the hour. There was an ethereal feeling to that moment that few others can touch. I walked over to where I could see Coit Tower, but opted not to go all the way up (big hill the day before the race? bad idea). From there I walked over a few blocks to where I could see Lombard street (from afar-- again, big hill the day before the race...). 
Back on the tour bus, we headed towards the coast to Fisherman's Wharf. I didn't get off but took a few pictures from the bus. It was over the Golden Gate, a quick photo shoot, and back over on the bus! From there, I got off at Golden Gate Park to check out the Japanese Tea Gardens. Absolutely beautiful! I didn't stay for tea, but wish I had! From there, the bus took us through the city to see a lot of amazing architecture and landmarks. If you're ever in the city and want to see a lot in a short amount of time, I highly recommend these bus tours. They're great!After the bus tour, I was starving but didn't want to waste time at a sit down restaurant by myself. I stopped in to a local pizza shop, bought a slice and a water for $4.25! The pizza was great and the water was much needed. I wandered on over to SFMOMA from there and soaked up some really stunning work! I could have spent so much more of my day in there and been happy as a lark. I ran into a dear friend who was in the city visiting for kicks. The Richard Avedon exhibit was absolutely unbelievable. Those images move you in ways you would never expect. It took me completely by surprise and in true Susan at MOMA fashion I walked through the exhibit with my mouth agape. I about lost my composure when I rounded a corner to be greeted with Ernesto Neto!
I had to contain myself from openly doing a happy dance right there on the spot. Other highlights of pure joy were Judy Chicago, Kiki Smith, Andrea Zittel, Jean Arp just to name a few. After SFMOMA, I was running out of time so I hotfooted it back to the hotel, threw on a clean shirt, and ran out the door to meet up with my team for our Inspiration Dinner/ Pasta Party. As an unrelated side note, there are super interesting street people in San Francisco... I saw the same guy at two different spots along the race course on Sunday!I had no idea what to expect. I was blown away. This is the part of the trip we call "speechless." Every Team In Training coach was lined up on both sides of the entrance to this convention center, decked out in every nutty bit of purple and green they could find armed with every noisemaker and cow bell they could get their hands on. Every single one of them were going nuts for every single one of us. It was beyond overwhelming. While we were all giddy with amazement, we were all brought to tears. (I'm tearing up just thinking about it.) For the 6 months we trained, these coaches were there for us through the pain, sweat, tears, chafing, crankiness, and every other emotion you can imagine. You'd think they'd be sick of us by now. Nope, they're so proud they're about to bust.... and to boot, they're cheering their butts off for you. Not only did they line up the lobby, they went down the stairs, and around the corner into the ballroom filled to the brink with tables for Team In Training chapters from all over the country. The inspiration was there all right! We then ate like we'd never seen food before (despite the mediocrity), and enjoyed some wonderful speakers including an amazing survivor (who ran the race with us!), Joan Benoit, and John Bingham. All were wonderful!
Rosalyn and I went back to Chinatown afterwards to pick up our last "oh, crap, I DO want to buy that" purchases before we hit the hay. Then, it was race day!
Race day.... it's here and you can't believe it. The gun finally goes off. 20 minutes later, you cross the start line. I will give the DJ props for immediately playing "...all the single ladies..." immediately after the gun. Kudos, good choice. The course was beautiful! Absolutely stunning! The hills were primarily in the first half and were not as awful as I expected. You train for hills so you're prepared. They were longer than anything we have in Greenville, but thankfully there were no cable car hills involved! The weather was pretty perfect for race day! It was overcast, a little foggy (but not so much you couldn't see the sights!), and cool (but not cold). The sun came out sporadically but never made it too warm. I felt great the entire first half and ran most of it, walking through the aid stations. Between mile 13 and 14, I started to hurt. Nothing specific, just pain. I kept going. I didn't stop to stretch even once. I knew if I stopped moving, I wouldn't start again. I kept going. I knew I needed to get to mile 19 by 1 pm or they'd reroute me. Somewhere around mile 16, I saw the 5:30 finish pace group on the other side of our out and back loop. I hadn't seen the 6:00 finish pace group pass me, which meant I was right where I needed to be. Shortly after, we saw the lake. That lake seemingly took forever to run around. This is the part of the trip I call "the valley." I reached mile 19 and relaxed a little. Shortly thereafter, I hit the wall... a big dark mental valley. From mile 21 or so until mile 24, it was bleak for me. I kept going through the pain but walked a lot. I crested that last hill onto the Great Highway and knew I'd finish. Finally, a very nice coach got our attention and said "just two stoplights ladies"... you want to talk about tears of joy? That started it. I couldn't see the finish line yet, but that meant it was there, just two stoplights ahead of me. Then I hit the really enthusiastic TNT cheer teams. They set my tears flowing. Thankfully, I pulled it together enough to cross the finish beaming instead of sobbing. Sadly, I didn't have anything left to enjoy the firemen at the finish. This is the part of the trip I call "brain dead." The volunteers graciously ushered me where I needed to go and I managed to find the giant TNT tent, and fall weeping into Rosalyn's arms. While she fetched a PB&J sandwich for me, our coaches found me and the tears continued. I shoved the sandwich in my face, despite the fact I didn't want it. We sat and chatted a bit, despite my minimal brain function. From there, it was a 1/2 mile walk to the shuttle and back to the hotel. Ice bath, hot shower, a little rest, and off to the Victory Party. We ate in the Relaxation Room of the Victory Party (pretty good food) and wandered over to the 80's room afterward. Penny got us (most of us) out on the dance floor and moving (ok, kinda-- in my case it was mostly upper body dancing). After a good time on the dance floor, we started fading pretty fast. And the daunting task of repacking faced us.... back to our rooms we went!
(This is for mom. She wanted me to wear a cape. I didn't but someone did!) (Tiffany's finisher's necklace!)From there, it was back on the plane (uneventful flight) and back down 85 to Greenville. The trip of a lifetime.
I want to thank all of you for all of your support (emotional and financial), love, encouragement, and prayers. I would never have gotten this experience any other way! Thank you to Coach Cathy and Coach Penny for everything! While I trained primarily by myself and had the support of Coach John all along the way, you two really pulled through for me in so many ways! Thanks to Rosalyn for being an awesome weekend roomie!
Now what?!
I'm currently cramming in preparation for Greenville's Open Studio Tour, then it's LLS's Turkey Trot on November 14th. The next big adventure? I'm not sure yet.... but I'll keep you posted.
Tuesday, August 25, 2009
NOT all about me...
I think the people around me have forgotten that this isn't all about me. I can see how that happens... the training is about my body, what I do, how I do it, and what I don't do. The fundraising has a lot to do with what I can organize, how I do it, and what energy I pour into it. It gets pretty personal. I see how the real reason can get lost in the shuffle of car washes, things for sale, and general gimmicks. I get it. It happens.
But it's NOT ABOUT ME. It's not about most of the people I know. It's about those I don't know. The few I know who have battled cancer have been amazingly brave and brazen. Their fear, for I know it had to be there, they did not show. Like warriors, they fought the good fight. Some won, some lost. Some barely had a chance to fight. Statistics show that someone dies from blood cancer every 10 minutes. And that's just blood cancers. 9.5% of new cancer cases in the U.S. are blood cancers (Leukemia, Lymphoma, and Hodgkin's Disease being the most common of those). THIS is what it's about.
I am healthy.
I am strong.
I am able.
and I have no guarantee that I will stay that way. Yes, I am accomplishing one of my own personal goals by completing a marathon. But, IT'S SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT. How many other lives am I reaching by tackling this goal? I will likely never know. It may be one, it may be one hundred.
Let's fight while we can, for those we can.
As for the latest fundraiser, I will say this: You only live once. And hair grows back. Let's focus on those who don't have a choice. There are so many who lose their hair not out of choice, not for a statement, not for appearances, but because they have no choice.
Let's get real.
But it's NOT ABOUT ME. It's not about most of the people I know. It's about those I don't know. The few I know who have battled cancer have been amazingly brave and brazen. Their fear, for I know it had to be there, they did not show. Like warriors, they fought the good fight. Some won, some lost. Some barely had a chance to fight. Statistics show that someone dies from blood cancer every 10 minutes. And that's just blood cancers. 9.5% of new cancer cases in the U.S. are blood cancers (Leukemia, Lymphoma, and Hodgkin's Disease being the most common of those). THIS is what it's about.
I am healthy.
I am strong.
I am able.
and I have no guarantee that I will stay that way. Yes, I am accomplishing one of my own personal goals by completing a marathon. But, IT'S SO MUCH MORE THAN THAT. How many other lives am I reaching by tackling this goal? I will likely never know. It may be one, it may be one hundred.
Let's fight while we can, for those we can.
As for the latest fundraiser, I will say this: You only live once. And hair grows back. Let's focus on those who don't have a choice. There are so many who lose their hair not out of choice, not for a statement, not for appearances, but because they have no choice.
Let's get real.
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